paige moss

Sometimes you go into robot mode, you know you don’t want to feel anything so you comfort your self with the things that make you feel safe. Like food or Tv or that one friend you call who never asks you how you are they just talk about themselves for an hour and you just pretend to listen cause it is keeping you from your own life. Ok on my second bowl of pasta and having one of those days its too late to call anyone and cable is now on the computer. Did you ever eat the Kraft pasta that came in a green box? You have to ad two cans of tomato sauce or one of tomato paste to a powder packet much like you used to have to do to the box macaroni before it got all fancy with the silver pouch of processed cheese. I always went the sauce rout because it is tangy and I like tangy. I am not a sweet girl when hard times hit it’s salt always salt. Well its really hard to find (the Kraft Pasta) and when I find it I always buy a bunch of boxes. My mom used to mail it to me when I was in collage. Ok why? Right that is the next logical question…well when I was young this was what I ate all the time. Box Kraft Spaghetti. To any normal person it probable taste like bad processed food. To me it taste like heaven, like I am eating a little bit of home or my childhood. So when I have a hard or stressful day that is what I want. That is what I crave when I am sad or feel frustrated. I am watching Gray’s Anatomy eating bad pasta and missing my smile. Work make’s me smile I love my work but for whatever reason Hollywood has all but given up on me. Not one casting director (well ok maybe 2) has stood by me (don’t get mad you know it’s true but you can also change it). I do not understand why and have grown tired of trying but please do not fear people because I don’t give up. (Talent will prevail!) Sorry remember I warned you about tangents…Well this all stemmed from an instant today at the gallery ( I haven’t written about it yet but I own an art gallery) a very talented but old artist tried to give us the runaround, made me laugh, what has happened to honesty. You would think an older more seasoned artist would have the respect and decency to be honest but much like Hollywood this artist is a coward, cant say something to our face. The funny thing is that when you are honest, the people you are honest too live they keep breathing they move on. Sometimes they even appreciate it. People with no balls no zest for life no courage all too often rule the world. Lets take it back. Be honest with one person today, and if you feel sad go find a box of Kraft spaghetti! I just did and I know I will feel better tomorrow…